this little life

in a world that seems to just want more, more, more – I dare you to do less.

following on from last week’s post, I want to chat about learning to be okay with taking a step back.

my learning to do less story.

in 2020 I started a cleaning business. I was in the worst place of my life and cleaning brought me calm, satisfaction and worthiness – feelings I’d never, ever felt.

I worked so hard, I learned so much, I met wonderful people but by 2022…I was fucking exhausted.

it took someone saying to me “are you sure you still want to do this?”

and seeing as I’d cried at every single shift that year…I knew the answer was no.

I felt embarrassed for ‘not being able to hold down a job’;

like a failure at even the thought of having to ‘close down a business’.

I felt like a giant loser, and I thought that’s what everyone else would think of me too.

BUT lets look at the wins here:

• this job got me through a really difficult time

• I met wonderful people

• and I learned LOADS

the job stops but everything I learned and experienced from it will travel with me into whatever comes next.

my body and my mind literally could not continue the way I was going and so I had to stop.

no shame. no failure. just a very clear sign for a change.

a very clear sign for me to do less.

“

when you get to a dead end, you don’t walk through the brick wall. you go back to where you turned and you find another way.

“

when we’re younger, life seems to move in a straight line.

education takes us up year group to year group until we’re spat out the other side.

so I think we can totally forgive ourselves for believing the only direction is forward.

the only direction is more.

but nothing about life is linear – this I can promise you.

and if you’ve made it to adulthood like me (massive pat on the back for making it this far)

the lines get squiggly as hell – thank goodness.

this is a blessing. the world is your oyster. and it is okay to not have a fucking clue what to do.

my suggestions on doing less.

“

if you can’t run, walk.

mental health nurse

the NHS mental health services weren’t a massive help to me in my recovery,

BUT in one of my weekly calls to get me out of bed a lady said this to me:

“if you can’t run, walk” – and my overworked brain exploded a with a sigh of relief.

it’s not about giving up and never trying again.

it’s about taking a step back and working from what you can actually do right now.

if all the advice in the world says ‘exercise 30 minutes a day’ and you can only face 10 or 5 or less…

do 10 or 5 or less.

if a target you set yourself leaves you feeling overwhelmed, turn the dial back until you have a target that you know you can achieve.

a target that pushes you to achieve but doesn’t suffocate you into not even being able to try.

do what is right for you and know that it’s okay for those targets to change: day to day, month to month, year to year.

“

the race is is long, and in the end, it’s only with yourself.

baz luhrmann

this conversation is a bit too massive for one blog post and I wish I had more answers for you.

but that’s what this messy corner of the internet is for,

for me and you to work it out together.

I hope it at least got your cogs turning for now to know it’s okay to slow down.

it’s okay to change direction, to take a step back and to do less.

you are a wonderful human being and you are doing great.

if this post inspired you or you have anything you would like to share or add, I would love to hear from you in the comments below.

thank you for spending time with me x